3 Important Lessons I Learned from Planning My Wedding
1. GO WITH YOUR GUT
In all aspects of life, especially with wedding planning, the phrase ‘go with your gut’ really is true. When hiring a vendor, you can get a ton of recommendations and spend hours online researching, but the only way to truly know if you’re making the right decision is by going with your gut instinct. Lets be honest, in the wedding industry venues and other vendors recommend their friends or those who get a cut of the deal. Reviews from other couples are great, but that doesn’t mean that you’re going to have the same positive experience or connect with that person the same way they did.
I know first hand how not listening to your gut can be detrimental to the planning process. Since our wedding had a lot of moving parts we needed to hire a wedding coordinator to execute all the logistics the day of. I was especially looking for someone who could communicate effectively since I believe that’s the most important skill a wedding coordinator should have. Based off the recommendation of our venue, we interviewed a coordinator who said all the right things and seemed pretty capable of getting the job done. We ended up hiring her even though a little voice in my head kept telling me that something wasn’t right and that we should keep looking. After a multitude of inconsistencies and lies, I knew she wasn’t capable or the right fit and we ultimately ended our working relationship. If I listened to my inner voice I could have saved myself from all the unnecessary stress and wasted time the sticky situation caused. So if you’re having any doubts throughout the process, don’t settle. Take your time and keep looking because you’re the only one who knows what will work best for you and make you happy.
2. VENDORS DON’T CARE
I don’t want to overgeneralize and say that ALL vendors don’t care, but from my personal experiences and hearing stories from other brides, a lot of vendors aren’t sincerely invested in your day. To them it’s just another job and you’re just another bride. Most vendors will tell you whatever you want to hear and once the contract is signed and the deposit is in their hands the relationship changes. The pretty mood board or their key selling points on what they will do for you quickly disappear. After you’re booked the attention they once gave you starts to lack and the communication dwindles.
It’s understandable that a lot of vendors have multiple weddings before yours and try to focus on your wedding closer to the day, but that creates even more stress for the bride. Ultimately, promises should be kept and communication should maintain especially when reaching out and trying to accomplish tasks. So choose your vendors wisely and if you find that special vendor who you connect with and who executed their responsibilities flawlessly, thank them! They’re few and far between.
3. LIFE ISN’T PERFECT AND YOUR WEDDING DAY IS NO EXCEPTION
Getting married in a city known for the best of pretty much everything and on the cutting edge of weddings and events, it’s no wonder why you’d expect the best on your wedding day. But it doesn’t always work out like that. I certainly didn’t expect my wedding day to be perfect, but I was hoping that I did enough ahead of time for the day to run smoothly and close to perfect as possible. Even with hiring ‘the best of the best’ vendors and having our reception at one of the top venues in the city there were a ton of things that went wrong. It’s difficult to trust people when you see incompetency right before your very eyes. I can go on and on about the 30 something specific issues, but the past is the past right?
So I will say it over and over again. Nothing is perfect. Leading up to your wedding you CAN strive for perfection, but please know that on your wedding day even though you’ve thought of every last detail not everything is going be executed exactly how you envisioned. I sincerely hope you do find your day to be perfect, but I’m being honest, it’s not realistic. It may rain at the worst possible time or a button may fall of your Grooms tux, but let it go and try to enjoy the day as much as possible. Believe me, your guests will have no idea that the flowers on your cake were the wrong shade of pink or your centerpieces weren’t exactly what you wanted.